identity

Being a Mom Doesn’t Mean Losing your Identity

It’s ok to be who you are and be a mom. It’s ok to be sexy and a mom. It’s ok to live your raw truth and still be a mom.

7 years ago when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter so much changed. I was no longer just responsible for myself. I changed what I ate, what I used on my skin and changed how I thought I needed to be. I now needed to be mom. Making the adjustments for health I am grateful for, but losing ‘me’ as an individual was hard. It took me years to realise that I can be me and mom at the same time.

For years after becoming a mom it felt like I was having an identity crisis. I felt lost, confused, scared, trapped and alone. I loved being a mom but hated the box I put myself into based on what I thought others moms would think. Or what society thought.

I broke out of that box and stood up for myself in a huge way! I started to be proud of my sexuality. Proud of being a women. I started to own my sexuality. And as a mom of a beautiful daughter I want her to own hers too.

This journey hasn’t been easy. On top of just the ‘mom’ box I have had to break though my own internal struggles with my sexuality. I used to fight so hard against it. I didn’t want to think of myself as a sexual being. Oh the attention, the looks, the anxiety that would come with that… But we are all sexual beings. We often forget that we came from sex. So why do we try so hard to block that side of ourselves?

I believe it’s because we have been taught to pretend it doesn’t exist. We have been taught to hide our instinctive biological parts of ourselves. Because they are ‘bad’, ‘naughty’ or ‘dirty’. Well who wants to think of themselves as bad, naughty or dirty? I sure didn’t. But that is what is put on us, especially women, and it’s simply not the truth.

I personally blocked my sexuality from myself also because I have had personal experiences sexual assault. So if hide from myself, my own sexuality then I would be safe right? What that lead to was me being powerless and my negative experience had the power. It stripped a huge part of me. A part that makes me a women.

So as I post this today I am making a stand for freedom and empowerment. To lift other women up. To help you — for you to own all of who you are. Mom or not. To break the mould to be you. Own all of you. And this is me. Finally being free.

Share this. Pass this along. Let’s unite and stand for women owning all of who they are and be proud of it. Let’s teach our daughters to be proud of themselves and show them how by being the example.