The little girl inside me.
The one that’s always there that just wants to be loved, accepted and nourished is currently being held, loved and wrapped in a cocoon of warmth in my womb.
Today I had a conversation with her.
I witnessed her pain, fear, and her desperate need to hide so she wouldn’t be seen. The pain I knew she lived with, as I am her, but when I connected with her today the pain was still very much alive and real for her as if it’s her current reality.
Darkness was around her and within her. Darkness from the emptiness inside. The loneliness inside. The feelings of being so messed up that there is no way she will ever belong.
This inner child within was fully seen today.
I was able to let her know that it’s ok. Of course she is scared and sad – her life completely changed overnight. Of course she doesn’t feel accepted – she was made to believe she’s f*{5b5c8818b45788ec0393187cda3473631c9bfc58af53ac8c7658cd11646902a3}ked up in the head. Of course there is darkness, because the pain didn’t know how to see the light.
But through all of that, I love her. I will always love her. I will always accept her. I will always listen to her. She will always belong within me as she is me and I am her.
I am writing this while still integrating the experience. While exploring the feelings, sensations and thoughts that are occurring within me. I didn’t know this precious girl within was still living in that state, and she is needing endless amounts of love and acceptance. Her hiding and darkness has kept me safe and unseen, but my child within no longer needs to feel the need to hide, unless she’s playing the game ‘hide and go seek’.
Life circumstances occur and often the child takes on things that are not meant for children. They experience adult things and are unable to process it because they are children.
My child didn’t know how to handle what was occurring around her. Didn’t know how to process any of it. So isolation, darkness, sadness, loneliness and fear became her coping mechanisms. But today gave her a new way of being. A new light, purpose and acceptance to shape her new reality. She has reclaimed her child role. Her light and airiness, all while being cocooned in endless amounts of love.
She is able to step down and no longer needs to protect me. My warrior goddess within is strong, fierce, and knows how to walk the path with love and vision.
Child, go play and soak up the love. The goddess is here to take on the world.